Tell him/her that doing so is the only way she/he can get you to not…
- send his cutest picture walking in a diaper to his friends’ cell phones.
- dance at the next dance she attends (model making a lasso over your head with one hand and smacking your backside with the other).
- hold his hand the next time you’re at the mall.
- share the name you had for him when he was a baby the next time you give his friends a ride.
- rap when her friends come over.
- ”accidently” text her boyfriend asking if she has completed her daily prayers yet.
- stand up at the next religious service your family attends, at an appropriate point, and ask if you could offer an example of your teen’s virtuous behavior so that other teens might benefit.
- keep clapping, after everyone else has stopped, at her next performance (sports, music, acting, etc.), shouting “woo-hoo! go girl go!”
- take out an add in the local paper with the caption “For (name of your teen)” with the words “Remember, mommy and daddy will always love you no matter what!”
- show up at her school wearing high water pants and green socks and
- if you’re a mom: bright pink lipstick that you apply outside of your lip line.
- if you’re a dad: moussed, spiked hair.
Of course, these are meant for the sake of humor only (well, mostly 😉 ). But, if you really are struggling with your teen’s behavior, perhaps a child therapist could help. One place where you might find a local referral is here.